Relaxing while spending time with family can sometimes feels like an oxymoron especially when you're a parent. At least that's how it seemed with my family. I swear we couldn't even sit quietly through a movie without someone crying because someone else was breathing the same air as them. Family time, however, is incredibly important in building relationships, memories, and skills. I think so many times we automatically think that making memories equals big vacations. Some of the greatest memories I have with my family occurred in my backyard. The thing that will strengthen a marriage and family is taking time to be together and doing it happily which is sometimes really hard to do.
Something as simple as eating dinner as a family is a wholesome recreational activity. That is something that I have missed since I've been attending college. Growing up our family always had dinner together and in those moments we've laughed, cried, and had some of the greatest conversations. I'll forever remember those feelings that I had with my family. One of the rules at my house is that electronics are not allowed. We just focus on family. When I was living at home I thought it was the dumbest rule ever but looking back I can see how beneficial it was. Limiting technology is a great way to enhance family time. It's also important to be doing things as a family that are not only relaxing but also build and strengthen relationships. How much time has your family spent outside in the past year? Being out in nature or even just out in the sun not only provides mental and emotional benefits. The reason that being out in the great outdoors really brings families together is because of the limitation or absence of technology and requires that you actually be involved with each other.
While it's important to be spending time as a whole family don't forget to spend quality time together as a couple. In the book Successful Marriages and Families it outlines three different types of leisure. There is parallel, joint, and independent. Parallel means everyone is doing the same thing but not really interacting. An example of that would be cleaning the house. Joint activities involve high levels of communication and interdependence so things like tennis or rock climbing. Independent is pretty self explanatory. Joint activities are the most beneficial because it requires communication. When you have a balance of all of these within your family and your marriage it will strengthen them. The key to having success though is compromise. If your spouse loves basketball and you don't you can still find ways to support them. There was a couple that I knew who the husband was a huge cowboys fan while his wife wasn't really into sports but you wouldn't know that just by watching her. Every game day she and the kids were in their jerseys. It was the cutest thing to see the love and support that she had for her husband.
Doing things all together as a family can be challenging especially when everyone has different likes and dislikes. While it may be difficult it still is incredibly important. One of my favorite quotes is "A truly good life is one characterized by a wide range of emotions". I think that is so powerful especially when talking about families. We need to have the good times along with the bad. So many of us just want to have perfect happy little families but that isn't healthy. We need to experience everything that life is going to give us.
If you're having troubles thinking of some things to do with your family here are some resources:
http://www.uisd.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/52-great-ways-families-can-spend-time-together.pdf
http://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/parenting/essentials/making-memories/10-ideas-creating-quality-time-with-your-kids#.VR7NmfnF-KI
http://mp-mydailythread.com/7-ways-to-spend-quality-time-with-your-family-%E2%80%93-and-have-a-blast-too/
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