Families and Abuse

Abuse is anything involving hurting, demeaning, and controlling others and unfortunately is common in families. In order to keep a marriage strong and healthy abuse a couple needs to do everything in there power to not allow any form of abuse into their home. I want to focus on something called intimate partner violence (IPV). Unfortunately this is more common in marriages than I even realized and there are many different types of it. One form of abuse is called intimate terrorism that includes behaviors such as terrorizing, manipulating, humiliating, and blaming. There is also such a thing as marital rape or adult sexual violence and is a form of domination and control. Psychological abuse consists of continued demeaning and devaluing a person. I think that we all know someone who has been in a relationship that was abusive and it is very easy to judge them. It's important to understand what they're going through and help them rather than demean them even more.

Most people in an abusive relationship do not leave the relationship and there are many reasons why. One reason is because they have been threatened by their partner and many women stay because their children have been threatened. Also many women do not have the resources to leave. When you discover that someone you love has been abused try to be understanding. Those who are in these situations are already emotionally unstable so it is very important that you show them love and try to be understanding. Consequences of IPV include PTSD, depression, stress, low sell-esteem, and substance abuse. There is also a large impact not only for the couple but also for any children that they may have. Usually children who are being maltreated have a parent who is being abused also. The child also begins to suffer from depression and become more delinquent. This is one of the reasons that IPV needs to be prevented and is such a serious thing. It never only affects one person.

It is possible to recover from abuse but it's not an easy process. Not everyone needs treatment but you are more likely to recovery faster with help from others. There are so many resources for those who have been abused to recover but the first thing that has to happen is they need to leave. If you or someone you love is suffering from abuse do everything in your power to do what's right. Here is an important lesson that I have learned. Fear holds us back in life. I have been in a mildly abusive relationship before and I understand the struggle of leaving. It is one of the most difficult things to admit and recognize that nothing will change other than you leaving. The main thing that I want you to take away from this is just to love others unconditionally. If we all loved each other abuse wouldn't exist. We need to do our part to help abuse cease to exist.